Maybe you didn't hear me... Who gets the friends?
Okay... maybe we're in a playground and I just wasn't informed. Possible but not likely considering all parties involved are well over the age of 5 and most are at least 5 times that age, some even 7 times that but whatever, not the point.
I was basically told tonight that I have to pick sides to which my counter was something along the lines of that's not going to happen b/c it's impossible. Sure, I know she screwed you over but hell - she's still my friend and I'm going to be supportive.
Scene 1: Nibski and I are on our way to the pub. We know that the parties in question are going to meet. We take our time walking S L O W L Y into the pub in hopes that it would have sorted itself out. mmmmm.... wishful thinking on our part.
Scene 2: Nibski and I witness Vi standing just outside the entrance to the pub. We stop. She turns. She starts to melt. Nibski panics sensing an emotional moment and naturally I step in to console.
Scene 3: Vi and I sit and talk through the tears of anger, annoyance, the "It's not fair"s and I let her know that Nibski and I will be fine if she and Ballboy are in the same room and only to do what she wants to do and feels comfortable with... we'll be fine!
Scene 4 (the longest be least evenful): In the pub. We drink. We eat. We talk. There are 6 of us there in total. We pay. We exit.
Scene 5: Everyone else has left, said their good-bye and good lucks to Rashy (going on trip) and Juicy(due to have baby next week) leaving Nibski, Ballboy and I in the parking lot. I'm ready to leave but have to wait for my ride. Dialogue begins and I begin to walk towards the men.
"Did YOU invite her?"
"Pardon?"
And it got bad from there. I tried to say that I wasn't going to be put in the middle of this and yes I know he was treated badly but I'm not going to not be friends with her just because I'm still friends with him.
"It it wasn't for me you wouldn't be friends with her. What do you actually talk about that doesn't have to do with work?"
Not really any of his business so I said that that wasn't true that we do talk about other things (which is true) and that I wasn't going to pick sides. It got kinda sad and scary and I was hoping that Nibski would jump in at some point to help me out... that point didn't come for a long time but he eventually tried by saying that I didn't invite her that we had come in together but that didn't seem to matter. I was in trouble and I'm not sure how to solve this one.
Apparently, I'm suppose to tell her that she needs to talk to him. But why should I? Why am I the go between? And why isn't he getting angry at Nibski or Rashy? Apparently because I'm easier to get angry with? Apparently we were his friends first and she's not suppose to have us as friends anymore... I don't like it.
I'm not sure what to do about this one except accept the fact that he was angry and upset more at her than me and take it as a compliment (though odd) that he feels comfortable enough to speak to me that way. It's true, that the people you feel the most at ease around are the ones you can really say the horrible things to b/c you know they will love you no matter what. Well, let me tell you... it still sucks... no matter how back asswards flatteringly you try to look at it. I love them both and that's the bitch of the whole situation.
I was basically told tonight that I have to pick sides to which my counter was something along the lines of that's not going to happen b/c it's impossible. Sure, I know she screwed you over but hell - she's still my friend and I'm going to be supportive.
Scene 1: Nibski and I are on our way to the pub. We know that the parties in question are going to meet. We take our time walking S L O W L Y into the pub in hopes that it would have sorted itself out. mmmmm.... wishful thinking on our part.
Scene 2: Nibski and I witness Vi standing just outside the entrance to the pub. We stop. She turns. She starts to melt. Nibski panics sensing an emotional moment and naturally I step in to console.
Scene 3: Vi and I sit and talk through the tears of anger, annoyance, the "It's not fair"s and I let her know that Nibski and I will be fine if she and Ballboy are in the same room and only to do what she wants to do and feels comfortable with... we'll be fine!
Scene 4 (the longest be least evenful): In the pub. We drink. We eat. We talk. There are 6 of us there in total. We pay. We exit.
Scene 5: Everyone else has left, said their good-bye and good lucks to Rashy (going on trip) and Juicy(due to have baby next week) leaving Nibski, Ballboy and I in the parking lot. I'm ready to leave but have to wait for my ride. Dialogue begins and I begin to walk towards the men.
"Did YOU invite her?"
"Pardon?"
And it got bad from there. I tried to say that I wasn't going to be put in the middle of this and yes I know he was treated badly but I'm not going to not be friends with her just because I'm still friends with him.
"It it wasn't for me you wouldn't be friends with her. What do you actually talk about that doesn't have to do with work?"
Not really any of his business so I said that that wasn't true that we do talk about other things (which is true) and that I wasn't going to pick sides. It got kinda sad and scary and I was hoping that Nibski would jump in at some point to help me out... that point didn't come for a long time but he eventually tried by saying that I didn't invite her that we had come in together but that didn't seem to matter. I was in trouble and I'm not sure how to solve this one.
Apparently, I'm suppose to tell her that she needs to talk to him. But why should I? Why am I the go between? And why isn't he getting angry at Nibski or Rashy? Apparently because I'm easier to get angry with? Apparently we were his friends first and she's not suppose to have us as friends anymore... I don't like it.
I'm not sure what to do about this one except accept the fact that he was angry and upset more at her than me and take it as a compliment (though odd) that he feels comfortable enough to speak to me that way. It's true, that the people you feel the most at ease around are the ones you can really say the horrible things to b/c you know they will love you no matter what. Well, let me tell you... it still sucks... no matter how back asswards flatteringly you try to look at it. I love them both and that's the bitch of the whole situation.
posted by Maggie at
10.5.06
1 Comments:
Not sure what the solution is. When I broke up with "you know who" I told my friends that I didn't want them to be put in the middle and have to "choose sides", because I thought that it was unfair of me to ask such a thing, she apprently didn't see it that way and basically made the choice for them by working things so I was eliminated from the picture entirely. To me, friends don't ask such things of each other, who's business is it of mine who you are friends with? If I have a problem with that person, for whatever reason, that's NOT your problem and I shouldn't make it yours. Just my thoughts anyway.
By
spankosaur, at 15/5/06 1:57 p.m.
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