Low moral/bitch fest
I'll start with a disclaimer... I just got back from an overnight band trip that was followed immediately by a 2.5 hour choir rehearsal with a clinician who wanted us to be 'free' therefore move our bodies all over the place while we sing. (you can image how that went over)
I am drained. You should, in theory, come back from a trip like this motivated and energized (not physically of course) and want to do so much more with your group and blah blah blah but not so much right now. There were only 20 of them. One decided the morning of that he didn't want to come. I had to phone him at home to figure out where the hell he was. He had learned the bass drum part for our March - now we were screwed. So I taught a very keen flute. There were three on the trip that I could have totally done without... not musically for two of them but in every other way - not needed at all. It's true that one sour grape will spoil the bunch and in this case was three poor attitudes that just sucked all my energy and made me not want to do anything for them.
Sure - they're young but there is something called RESPECT and SELF CONTROL and just plain SPORTSMANSHIP. I'm sick of hearing "I'm gunna quit" from the same two and then in the next sentence hear "just kidding" with a brush of the hand in the air and a quickly little "I'm only saying j.k. so you think I'm j.k but really I'm serious" smirk which is hard to take time and time and time and time again. My other personal UNfavourite is "Can i get changed now" 20 times.. I'm not kidding 20 f**king times in a row from the same person. Okay - fine. They're not the most attractive sweaters but get a grip!
It is all my fault that I'm feeling so dejected and just not caring and thinking that I'm a terrible teacher and all that because of the comments of the minority. (and the "well, no one's signing up for band next year anyway" is another gooder to hear on a trip.. yes, I did all this planning because it's FUN for ME!... i don't think so). If I were a confident and mature person, I would just let all the negativity roll of my back and not give a rat's ass what happens to the music program at my school but I'm not confident or mature in my teacher skills yet so I do take things to heart, especially when it's my job and basically my passion on the line. If I don't have kids in my classes, I have failed because the message is clear that we don't want to be here so we're choosing not to. You don't have that problem in real subjects. (yes this is a bitch fest - deal with it)
What's the worst part? These kids are talented. There are good. They are musical. They just don't care and I am taking up the slack for them in that department when I guess I need to be hard hearted. If I wasn't a wimp - I would just move but is that gonna happen any day soon? Nope. So until the next millennium when I may move, I'll just sit here and wonder what my potential as a teacher could be if I could spark the kids enough so that they want to play. I don't think I'll get to that point before term ends and they are finished with my class considering that's two classes away.
As the kids would say "Whatever... get over it. Just Kidding...Chill out man."
I am drained. You should, in theory, come back from a trip like this motivated and energized (not physically of course) and want to do so much more with your group and blah blah blah but not so much right now. There were only 20 of them. One decided the morning of that he didn't want to come. I had to phone him at home to figure out where the hell he was. He had learned the bass drum part for our March - now we were screwed. So I taught a very keen flute. There were three on the trip that I could have totally done without... not musically for two of them but in every other way - not needed at all. It's true that one sour grape will spoil the bunch and in this case was three poor attitudes that just sucked all my energy and made me not want to do anything for them.
Sure - they're young but there is something called RESPECT and SELF CONTROL and just plain SPORTSMANSHIP. I'm sick of hearing "I'm gunna quit" from the same two and then in the next sentence hear "just kidding" with a brush of the hand in the air and a quickly little "I'm only saying j.k. so you think I'm j.k but really I'm serious" smirk which is hard to take time and time and time and time again. My other personal UNfavourite is "Can i get changed now" 20 times.. I'm not kidding 20 f**king times in a row from the same person. Okay - fine. They're not the most attractive sweaters but get a grip!
It is all my fault that I'm feeling so dejected and just not caring and thinking that I'm a terrible teacher and all that because of the comments of the minority. (and the "well, no one's signing up for band next year anyway" is another gooder to hear on a trip.. yes, I did all this planning because it's FUN for ME!... i don't think so). If I were a confident and mature person, I would just let all the negativity roll of my back and not give a rat's ass what happens to the music program at my school but I'm not confident or mature in my teacher skills yet so I do take things to heart, especially when it's my job and basically my passion on the line. If I don't have kids in my classes, I have failed because the message is clear that we don't want to be here so we're choosing not to. You don't have that problem in real subjects. (yes this is a bitch fest - deal with it)
What's the worst part? These kids are talented. There are good. They are musical. They just don't care and I am taking up the slack for them in that department when I guess I need to be hard hearted. If I wasn't a wimp - I would just move but is that gonna happen any day soon? Nope. So until the next millennium when I may move, I'll just sit here and wonder what my potential as a teacher could be if I could spark the kids enough so that they want to play. I don't think I'll get to that point before term ends and they are finished with my class considering that's two classes away.
As the kids would say "Whatever... get over it. Just Kidding...Chill out man."
posted by Maggie at
1.3.06
3 Comments:
I've said it before and I'll say it again - Kids Suck! Especially when they make you feel like you aren't a good teacher!
You know you rock, they just can not appreciate you because their tiny little minds are not developed enough to comprehend the massive gift you are giving them by providing them with music in their lives. (Plus come on band class is the easiest and most fun class to take and get good grades in! - unless you are a moron.)
Remember that as long as you have one person in your class that you get through to, you have done your job. If one kid walks away with even half the appreciation you have for music, congratulations.
In todays society where instant gratification is the norm, you are teaching them that hard work and perserverance can help them accomplish great things. Both lessons that will benefit them when they are old enough to realize it.
(woah - I have to go throw up now - because that ended up being way too happy happy joy joy)
If that doesn't help, remember that you are still being paid to do something to you love and to breathe. Then come Friday pull out the booze - because if there is one thing I know it is that teachers now how to drink - so embrace your inner lush and have at it!
By
Likalia, at 2/3/06 9:35 a.m.
Well, I was thinking a lot of things while reading your post, but Likalia has pretty much said them all. Just one thing to add; even the "confident and mature" ones doubt themselves. They just don't tell you. Or maybe they don't even tell themselves. At any rate Likalia's right about the tiny little minds not getting it. And for every one that is being obnoxious there's probably one that is appreciative. Unfortunately they are probably the quieter ones that won't necessarily tell you so.
Repeat after me "I am a good teacher, I rock! And in two days it's Friday, thank god" ;)
By
Indigo Eve, at 2/3/06 11:56 a.m.
You know Likalia and I think almost exactly alike, so what she said. :)
By
spankosaur, at 2/3/06 4:48 p.m.
Post a Comment
<< Home